Wednesday, February 23, 2005

De Gender Gap

Had a very informative conversation this afternoon. Mi uncle was tellin' mi about a coworker ov his (a J'can he met since migratin' to London), an' de coworker's controversial views. De guy is married, but still somewhat radical. He offered to introduce mi uncle to a young English-woman ov J'can parentage. He kept repeatin' to mi uncle how "nice" an' "good" de 28-year-old is. "She's a total lady, pure as her own birfday," he told mi uncle. Mi uncle thought that meant she's a virgin--not an appealin' thought to any man who's aged past de big 4-0. Mi uncle says he told de coworker, "I'm not a teenager; I'm about buyin' de orchard an' plantin' fruit, not pickin' cherries." De coworker quickly clarified that de lady's "seal was broken," (ah know, it's horrid an' chauvinistic!), but said that de woman's been celibate for about 8 years. "Yes, that would be safest, all considerin'," mi uncle said, but de coworker said, "No, mate, it's not just a question ov health an' safety." Then, he proceeded to explain how a woman's inward an' outward esteem drops just a bit more wif each new partner, an' how a man's inward an' outward esteem rises just that much wif each new partner he has. Mi uncle asked him if he missed de Women's Lib movement, but now mi uncle says to me, "That's still de world we live in, Mel. That's why a man should never take for granted when a woman sleeps wif him, 'cause by sleepin' wif him, she runs such a social risk coupled wif de regular risks. That's quite a bit ov emotion she's got in de balance." Then he explained to me why mi aunt's always been so stern an' strict. Turns out, way back when mi aunt was in high school, she an' a male neighbour were walkin' along Eastwood Park Road, when a motorist called out to her, "Hey, White Liver! When me can get my piece?" Those words started a lot ov snickerin' an' outright laughter at mi auntie's expense. De motorist didn't know mi auntie, an' still doesn't. They were complete strangers, but because her features fit some stereotype he has, he threw de slur at her. Mi auntie was very ashamed--a little before that, a relative ov hers had been assaulted, an' people had dismissed de assault wif de same kind ov slur. Mi auntie took de insult personally. She cut her hair to everyone's surprise, an' started wearin' very baggy clothes an' long skirts instead ov regular jeans. That didn't deter those who wanted to hold on to stereotypes, they just labeled her conservative appearance as "sneakin'," so that they could keep her in their narrow-minded view. She's always been very circumspect in her appearance an' her behaviour. She stayed in a rocky marriage for decades, just because she didn't want "talk" to go 'round if she moved on (talk about livin' your life for other people--wake up, woman!). Ah thought she was just too uptight; however, now ah understand why she always spoke so sternly to me, an' why she set me such (unrealistic?) boundaries. In her day, judgement fell hard on women--it still does in de curious customs ov some societies, as ah learnt from Sunshine's Blog. An' as tough as it is for men to be men, it still seems tougher for women to be women in many respects.

Monday, February 21, 2005

A Book from A Book-Sale

Ah just started readin' an old book named "Please Love Me" by an author named Miller. It's de true story ov a beautiful Hollywood starlet, who unfortunately has a very Puritanical mother & an ice-cold father. De girl eventually gains modest fame (they didn't use her real name in de book), after bein' tossed about on de castin' couch, an' then bein' discovered as a beauty or a talent (introducin' de beautiful or talented, Miss County Farm!). However, she's so bitter about her own life from de very start (although on de surface she appears to have it all) that she tells a horrid lie on her 'best friend' an' gets de girl in serious trouble; she almost starts a forest fire; an' at de height ov her modelin' career, she still has no female friends because ov her suspicion that other women have an easier life than she's ever had. She's de "girl next door" all-American blonde wif social status an' de old-money to go wif it, but she envies her maid--a dirt-poor Black woman (de story's set in de 50s-60s)--because she thinks de black woman prob'ly has a more lovin' family than she's ever had. She joins de circus, then finally discovers Christianity. That's where we're all supposed to get sentimental an' cheer for her?! Ah haven't finished de book, because ah can't quite sympathize wif de woman's mean-ness. Her likkle superiority complex that makes her feel that other females should chase after her to be worthy ov her friendship, while she stands aside in judgement ov them an' ov all they do, an' tries to sniff out any cracks in their armour or weak spots in their personality, just makes her seem so hateful--'B-I-T-C,' might begin to describe her. Ah can understand that she internalizes some fings--introverts tend to be more outspoken when irritated, an' more contemplative otherwise--ah can relate to that--but her decision to busy herself behind de scenes, tellin' lies an' makin' so much malicious likkle mischief just doesn't sit well wif me. De author tries to paint her as a sympathetic heroine, a misunderstood Cinderella, but her joy at others' misfortune, her anger at others' good fortune, an' her inability to feel good about herself unless she's criticizin' or puttin' down another girl just doesn't endear her to de reader. I'm stuck wonderin' how someone who's blessed wif all de comforts ov upper-middle America could feel justified in begrudgin' those less fortunate, simply because her life wasn't perfectly perfect--an' she suspects de less fortunate might have de one fing that she really wants. Ah fink if de book teaches young girls anyfing, it teaches them what NOT to do, if they want love an' affection from de people around them. Anyway, havin' said that, I'm not yet at de point where I'd recommend de book.

Sunday, February 20, 2005


Didn't get much sleep last night, so ah fell asleep durin' de service today--throughout de service. Embarrassin'--had to be nudged awake a few times, but still missed most ov it. Barely heard de Benediction, didn't know when collection was takin' place. (Ah was too sleepy to notice how sleepy ah was, before actual sleep kicked in.) I'm a loner in church as much as anyone can be a loner in any church--'loner' just goes against de nature ov fellowship, so maybe ah go against de nature ov fellowship--an' I'm not a part ov de women's ministry. (Have ah ever mentioned that ah have poor social skills, an' am too shy in person to project de confidence that builds a lot ov friendships?) Not bein' a part ov that ministry means I'm on de outside ov it in every practical sense. Anyway, one ov de ministry's lively personalities decided to minister to mi for all ov 2 minutes.
She: What happened today?
Piggy: Ah fell asleep.
She: Oh, you felt ill.
Piggy: Ah fell asleep.
She: The message was so vital--you couldn't just fall asleep; you must've felt ill.
Piggy: Actually, Sister (X), ah fell asleep.
She: Sister (Y) did a very good creative-dance performance. Surely, you didn't miss that, or were you still not well at that point?
Piggy: (Tryin' ta recall de performance--Sister (Y) has a thick, voluptuous figure that had set all de Brothers starin' at her in her leotards an' wispy tutu, as she'd approached de pew to explain de relevance ov her dance to her singles' ministry. Mr. Pig had nudged mi awake when Deacon called up de Sister to do her dance, but I'd fallen asleep again immediately.)
She: (quick embrace) Not to worry, dear. Just f
eel better soon, okay?
Piggy: (woulda returned embrace, but embrace done a'ready) Okay.
From what ah remember ov de sermon, Reverend was talkin' about de disciples, an' de importance ov wisely choosin' our company. He started off by readin' from Isaiah 3, then from Matthew 10, then somewhere else in de Old Testament, Luke? Then some-fing, an' then some-fing. What can ah say? Choose your company--that's what ah remember--de service went over mi head this week. Hush.

Saturday, February 19, 2005

Luv 4 Miss Lou

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Bloggers, this is a picture ov Miss Lou. Mi Grandma is still at de top ov mi female luv list, but Miss Lou an' mi English teacher from Wolmer's are two women whom ah also luv an' respect--Barbara Gloudon's prob'ly still another, but that's a whole 'nother Blog. Anyway, ah luv Miss Lou for many reasons. She's always been wise enough to value de culture ov her nation. Some folk never learn how to value their own, so it was a great lesson ah learnt as a child an' even now from Miss Lou. Mi earliest memories involved watchin' de end ov her Ring Ding career, an' it would've been so much nicer to have seen her throughout her Ring Ding TV career, but I'm still grateful that ah saw any ov it--even if it was de very end. She's always celebrated de J'can patois dialect in poetry an' prose, when others sneered at their own dialect in JA--what's even more remarkable is that she excelled an' still excels at it, havin' taken it to de level ov an art-form. She's quite elderly now, an' unfortunately a widow as ov a few years ago. She never got rich from her vast volume ov work, but she didn't do any ov it for de luv ov money, she did it for de luv ov people an' de preservation ov their/her culture, so she deserves to be happy. If she ever reads this Blog, ah want her to know that ah luv her too. I'll post a few ov her poems every now an' then, so we can enjoy her talent on de Blog. Have a nice weekend!

Friday, February 18, 2005

Dinner This Evenin'

This evenin', we went to dinner wif a couple we met at a "Pilgrim's play" that was put on by Children's Workshop--it seemed we had a bit in common. There was such a pleasant camaraderie between us that we exchanged numbers when de play was over. (It was an okay likkle play, some kids forgot their lines--one ov them got stage-fright an' burst into tears an' his mother rushed to de platform, yellin', "Focus, Frankie! Focus!" Didn't know whether to laugh or cry along wif him. De mother wants to turn him inna de next Wesley Snipes, an' de kid prob'ly just wants to be sittin' in de audience eatin' poporn.) Anyway, we've developed some kinda friendship. We went to a few poetry-SLAMs together--turns out de husband luvs poetry as much as De Piggy does--an' de wife an' I've gone to two can-can sales together. They're a bit older than we are, an' de husband's a fan ov vintage reggae, soh when he found out that Mr. Pig used to play-out, he came over to drink some punch-a-creme (shout-outs to Sunshine!) an' listen to some music wif Mr. Pig for de New Year's. They've been married for 8 years, an' have 2 kids. This evenin' we went wif them to one ov mi favourite places, a small fusion restaurant (American, Asian, Italian, unfortunately no Caribbean), where mi favourite waiter works. He's mi fave 'cause he's legitimately gay--maybe homosexual, but no, that's not it--he's got real gaiety, a very upbeat, peppy personality wif a zest for life that just makes yu live a likkle bit harder when he's around. (He luvs mi clothes, an' ah luv his personality, so we get on.) Anyway, we were seated, an' mi fave waiter brought us decaf, biscotti, an' water, while we went over de menu like we weren't goin' to order de same shrimpy chicken & pasta wif garden salad that we always got. There's a tense silence, 'cause de other couple is very tight-lipped tonight. We don't know why, since this dinner date was their idea in de first place. What are they mad about? Mr. Pig an' I exchange confused glances. "What's de matta, people?" Mr. Pig pronounces de Black Uhuru intro like a joke, tryin' to break de ice an' get them to open up. They barely mumble nothing. Mr. Pig looks at me like, "WTF?" Then they decide to get steak--well done--an' tense silence continues, except for oldies playin' quietly. Now there's mi fave waiter singin' "Everlastin' Love" an' breakin' up de uneasy silence, while skillfully servin' us our meal wif his usual flair. De food is great, an' hungry as ever, ah dive in. THEN, they want to talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. And they want undivided attention. "This is it for our marriage," he announces. "Nobody's fault, but this is it." We look blankly at him. WTF?
"It's over," says de wife. "It done! Totally done."
That's why they suggested we go to dinner together this evenin'? WTF?
Now, there's de way to disturb a good meal. Then Mr. Pig goes into fix-it mode, an' starts suggestin' counselors an' such, but they say they don't want any counselor, "It's just over." Now, this ticks off Mr. Pig. He doesn't believe in people discussin' problems that they don't want to solve. "Since yu don't want no counselor, then don't bother bring it up," he says. "Let's just enjoy our money's worth of a good meal and go home." But no. They want to vent. And vent. Even though de husband said it's nobody's fault, they're suddenly goin' on about who said what an' who did what when where. They get a bit heated, an' distract de couple at de next table. I'm still eatin', swallowin' up de evenin', can't wait to go pick up de Piglet an' reach back home. Fave-waiter rushes over before their squabble gets more noticeable, an' seein' that their steak's been ignored, he coaxes them wif delicious dessert on de dumbwaiter. De woman looks close to tears. She doesn't want any pistachio creme pie. De man's face is set like, "Whatever!" I'm tryin' to be tactful an' not upset her any more than she already is, but not Mr. Pig. "(Waiter), split this down de middle," he says. "An' bring 2 doggy bag, please." Fave waiter relaxes a bit, he knows us--though he doesn't know de other couple--an' he trusts us not to let anyfing escalate. De husband isn't at all pleased wif Mr. Pig's indifference, but bein' indifferent, Mr. Pig don't care. Soon, we're all paid up--fave waiter is tipped even better than usual--an' we're goin' into our car, as they go into theirs--few strained partin' words said, as we leave. "We'll call you guys later," de husband tells us, an' they're drivin' off. We can hardly wait to get home, but instead ov comin' straight home, we stop at de park, sit on a bench lookin' at de frozen stream, an' go over what just happened. "Don't them did look happy?" Mr. Pig asks, an' I'm like, "Yep, but who really knows?" Evidently, they weren't happy--they aren't right now--but they gave a good impression ov happiness. "We can't mek that happen to we," Mr. Pig says, an' de thought ov it is so scary that we snuggle up on de bench for a good 20 minutes just starin' at de pond whose ducks are nowhere to be seen, before wi goh pick up de Piglet, an' drive come home. I'm still like, "WTF?"

Thursday, February 17, 2005

AI Rant

Am somewhat disappointed wif American Idol tonight. One ov mi favourites (Ross, de redhead who sang Frank Sinatra songs at de Las Vegas audition) got sent home last night, an' two ov mi other favourites got sent home tonight. De guy had a quirky, spiky-blond look, an' Simon's funny about that kinda fing, so even though de guy was VERY talented ah kinda understood, but Jackie de 16-yr-old wif de mellow voice who seemed like a shoo-in got sent home. Maybe it was because she said she'd re-enter if she got sent home that made them believe it was okay to eliminate her now. I'm not pleased. No, they don't give a hoot. Ah vowed last year that ah don't like American Idol any more, after mi favourite got eliminated early out, an' ah was sure that ah didn't care about de show. Ah kept tellin' people that, but after seein' this season's auditions, it sucked me in again, only to piss mi off. It's not worth de anger, but de show is so unfair. They sent home de redhead 'cause he made de mistake ov scattin' when he should've been beltin' out lyrics at his last audition. That guy wanted it SO badly, an' he would've been good too, so he deserved to get it, but they rejected him--after they'd already chosen Marlea, de girl who rejected THEM! This is what J'can people woulda call "wanty-wanty can't get it, but getty-getty don't want it!" Sux, sux, sux, sux!

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Make A Piggy

Kami's good friend, Virgo, posted a "How To Make Me" chart that ah found quite interestin', so ah commented that I'd add such a chart to mi Blog, an' here's Da Piggy's version ov it (only de data, not de columns an' rows, 'cause ah don't know how to do that part):

How to make me:

1 part industrious
1 part (mad-scientist) creative
2 parts nutty an' impulsive (:^)
2 parts loyal an'

So, Bloggers, would ya like to say even one ov your own ingredients or how to make a 'you'?

Monday, February 14, 2005

Da Piggy

Hi, Bloggers, here's a fuzzy picture ov Da Piggy. (Yu didn't fink I'd post a clear-as-day picture ov mi-self after cussin' out mi workplace an' callin' be bosses hemorroids, now did yu?) Anyway, yu never know who's readin' or where they hail from, so I'll do like Yammie did, an' say, "If you're readin' this, please write 'I read' in de comments, to let Da Piggy know that yu visited. Have a great day!

Sunday, February 13, 2005

From Today's Sermon

What Da Piggy took from today's sermon:
God wouldn't lead us to it, without leadin' us through it, so whenever life gets really challengin', take comfort in de knowledge that all is never lost an' you can never be lost wif God, because he'll lead you through de harsh times. Like de song says, "There's victory in Jesus."

Friday, February 11, 2005

Some Folk

Some folk are experts at gettin' on people's last nerves--annoyin'! Today, de traffic lights weren't workin' at de merge lane ov de busy intersection near de mall. One would fink that this means motorists should drive extra carefully, right? Nope! Not so for everybody. De girl drivin' de car in front ov us was busy listenin' to music, an' decided that not only should she dance, but her car should dance as well--even at a broken traffic light!! If that's not somebody beggin' to be rear-ended, then ah don't know what is. She can see only about 2 car lengths along de road to her left, an' she's in de right-turn lane intendin' to turn right. She'll have to yield if cars race from behind de steep corner on her left, rushin' to de mall. Precarious position indeed when there are no traffic signals to regulate it, yet she's makin' her car dance. Every time she releases her brakes, it looks like she's about to dash out to try an' catch a quick merge into de flow ov traffic. Alas, no, she isn't doin' that! She's just stompin' on de brake an' lettin' it go in time to de music. I'll admit, we're all likely to have done that immature crap at some point or other--maybe as sophomores--but not as MATURE adults, an' she looks like a grown woman. Her car sounds like a mobile dance-hall--which is fine, except she's distracted as heck, an' still she's actin' up at de broken stop-light, without mergin' into traffic. De drivers behind me don't know what's goin' on wif her, 'cause they can't see over de top ov mi vehicle, an' there's no room to go 'round her, so they're honkin' their horns 'til she finally merges into traffic. It really takes ALL kinds! Have a good weekend!

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Great Voice

If William Shatner or his vocal twin, Regis, spoke "normally," would anyone impersonate either ov them? And on Idol, only de best match-up ov voice an' personality usually gets a chance. So d'you notice how some people's voice just seems to fit them to a tee, an' other people's voice seems to have been stolen from someone else's frame, MIKE TYSON!! Sorry for that Tourette's moment, but let's continue. Sometimes de most seemingly mismatched voice can be a blessin'; can yu imagine Q-Tip bein' so distinctive without that smooth, almost effeminate voice checkin' da rhyme? Whenever Mr. Pig an' I've got to be apart for any span ov time, short or long, his voice is always what gets me goin' as soon as ah see him again. Once he was waitin' to pick me up at de airport, an' ah was tryin' to find him in de post-customs confusion. Ah was scannin', lookin' for his face in de crowd, when a kid shouted above de noise to ask mi de time, an' as soon as ah shouted above de noise an' answered, ah heard that vibrant voice that ah love so much callin', "Piggy, a you that? Mi hear yu, but mi can't find yu." We soon found our way through de crowd an' de high heaps ov bag an' pan bein' rolled about, but that's still one ov de sweetest sounds I've ever heard in mi life. Ah can't describe his voice, it's not really a husky tenor, it just might be a livelier version ov that. When he talks, yu can always hear how ready he is to laugh or sing a song whose lyrics he mightn't even know--heaven help de song--but that's what makes it so hard to imagine his voice when I'm not hearin' it. When anyone asks what's mi favourite song, de memory ov him at de airport comes to mind before any song does. If Mr. Pig had a boomin' Lou-Rawls-Earl-Jones voice, maybe we wouldn't even be married--superficial as it sounds. After all, if Michael Jackson's voice came out every time Farrakhan opened his mouth, there might be no Nation. Voices are powerful, even at their weakest, wouldn't ya agree?

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

2 Qt!

Hi, Bloggers, ah just read this cute little story an' it tickled me so much that I'm sharin' it wif everyone. Here it is:
An emergency delivery had to take place at a mother's home at the last minute. Due to a shortage of personnel and a power outage at the time, only one paramedic responded to the call, and the house was very, very dark. The paramedic asked Katelyn, a 3-year-old girl, to hold a flashlight over her mommy so he could see while he delivered the baby. Very diligently, Katelyn did as she was asked, watching with wide eyes as her mother pushed and pushed until little Connor was born.
The paramedic lifted the infant by his little feet and slapped the baby on his bottom. Connor began to cry. Concerned that Katelyn might be upset at seeing her baby brother crying from being slapped, the paramedic gently turned his attention to Katelyn, thanked her for her help and asked her what she thought about what she had just witnessed.
Katelyn looked firmly at her newborn brother and quickly responded, "He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again!"

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Hard Not to Notice It

De Reverend ov mi old church has been drivin' de latest model SUV ov a certain kind, an' has been sportin' ten-gallon hats like a black cowboy. That somewhat showy persona was but one ov de reasons we switched to a dif'rent church, shallow as it may seem--we decided to be non-denominational in findin' a church when we moved to our town. After settlin' into de new church, we saw de Rev when we went to de supermarket. He was walkin' into a nearby Radio Shack--still dressed like a three-piece-suit wearin' cowboy, an' Mr. Pig commented, "But wait, Piggy! Noh him a encourage everybody fe contribute an' sponsor him fellowship trip to JA, but look how him supe-up him wheels!" Ah didn't say much to that, but ah wondered about it, tryin' to view that Rev as an 'original' in de way ov Bing Crosby, Bill Cosby, Slick Rick, Bob Dylan, Bette Davis, Stevie Wonder, J.R. an' Sue Ellen, Katharine Hepburn--even Flava Flav--people whose individuality just jumps out at ya an' legitimizes all they do--but it didn't work. De pastor don't rock such. In all his style an' fashion, maybe he's tryin' at individuality like de King ov Pop seems ta try unsuccessfully at Elvis' enigmatic persona, or like Elvis succeeded at Be-bop Rock'n'Roll's then-radical characters. ANYway, in de end, we decided that as far as Rev was concerned, we should ignore de Rolli on da arm, stop wonderin' if he's pourin' Chandon, an' not Hate on a brother 'cause he's got it goin' on. However, we moved on from that church anyway, after it came to light that its other Reverend was involved in de abuse ov a teenager whose parents understandably hid her away after that. At that point, we an' MANY members said, "This definitely isn't our church home!" Funny, it wasn't de Rev whose flashy fashion threw us, who ended up wif de legal an' religious problems; it was de other (overlooked) Rev. This evenin' we saw someone who looked like de flashy Rev, an' ov course Mr. Pig had a sour expression again--couldn't blame him, ah had de same expression too. De Bible does say, "Render your hearts and not your garments," or such, but it's hard not to notice certain heights ov flashiness, isn't it?

Sunday, February 06, 2005

Happy Earthday, Mr. Marley!

Kami says it's possible to write about Bob on his earthday without sounding off at his widow who now has so much conflict. Here's a try.
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Ode to Bob, Owed to Bob

Bob, what would Jamaica be

If you were never born to we?

From Reggae to Dancehall, Deejay to Rap,

Jamaica woulda hardly deh 'pon de map!

What would Jamaica do were it not for you?

Win few Olympic race, then retreat into "A who?"

We all know, if you were never there,

We'd be ackee bidout saltfish, an' so-soh dry bulla bidout de pear.

Even now yu spirit chants in warm, vibesy tones

Singing, "Please don't yu rock my bones!"

But some still determined fe rock yu bones.

Them say it don't matter where yu bury

Because that can't change where yu did born,

But Jamaica fightin' to keep yu restin'

Forever within its arms.

We give thanks an' praise to Father God

For his blessed gift named Bob.

Happy Earth-strong, Bob!

Saturday, February 05, 2005

A Rose Just For You . . . All!

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This is just to test de photo bucket that Kami told mi about. This flower is mi early Valentine's treat to all ov yu luvly Bloggers an' stalkers out there. Next, ah might just publish mi Granny--ah tried to publish her this mornin', but me an' Gramm' need to wheel an' come again. Have a nice weekend!

Friday, February 04, 2005

Ah Heard

LL Cool J was on American Idol last night, and NOW ah really believe de 'L's in his name--he IS lovable. He actually brought out Simon's sensitive side, an' had Simon offerin' to hug rejected contestants. Who'da thunk it? However, when ah really consider LL's career, it just made sense. He was always more than just a pretty face. LL's wholesome, but still edgier than Will Smith--a tough balance to strike. (We could forgive him de "Pass da Ol' Gold" line in his comeback rap that said "Don't call it a comeback!" Also, we could forgive him de drug Kingpin role he played in "In Too Deep"--hey reality's reality.) He's remained true ta himself for da most part, even at his most mass appealin' (rememba EPMD, Jdid?)
LL is settin' an example for people ov all ages--which is so fragile, 'cause so many would want to adopt him as an ABSOLUTE role model, an' then get suicidal if LL falls from grace. Yeah, we gotta rememba that he's only human, but still de fact is, he seems like such a good person. On American Idol, he far exceeded everyone's expectations in de love that he showed EVERY contestant--good an' bad. He's a family man, an' a likeable individual, so ah just had to add him to mi Blog. True ta himself, he's showin' that it can be done.
Today, ah heard about a hurricane rippin' through Bermuda--rough enough to close down all but de most essential gov't services. De hope is that de hurricane's effects will be far less severe than we've been witnessin' in recent times in other places. Heard it's still pretty bad, an' ah gotta verify that. If 2005 isn't a wake-up call to almost every region of God's green earth, then people, I don't know what is! Have a great day!

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Blog Test

De previous was a Test Blog, but this is a test for Bloggers to check out their psych state. Answer de questions below, an' then interpret it wif de key below it. Try it, it'll be fun.

1. You're walkin' in de woods, wif whom are yu walkin'?
2. You see an animal, what kinda animal is it?
3. What do yu do wif/to de animal?
4. You see a house an' enter it, what's on de table in de house?
5. You step out & see a drinkin' goblet on de ground, what's it made ov?
6. Is it old/new--what do ya do wif de goblet?
7. You see a body ov water--puddle, pool, ocean, etc.--what is it?
8. What do yu do wif de body ov water.

This is supposed to give ya a glimpse ov yu own emotional predisposition.
1. De person yu walk wif, is de most important one to you.
2. De animal yu see represents your view ov yu fears.
3. How yu deal wif de animal is how yu deal wif yu fears.
4. What's on de table's what yu take from life--flowers/food=joy.
5. De goblet yu see is yu view ov what you're made ov.
6. How yu treat de goblet is how yu treat yourself.
7. De body ov water represents your sensuality.
8. How you indulge or refrain is how yu indulge or refrain in life.

What do ya fink? Does it reflect de real you?

Test Blog

Will this post show or won't it? Don't know what happened to mi post yestry-day about LL Cool J, an' partly about de hurricane in Bermuda. If this post also disappears, then I'll know mi Blog's broken. :-( If it shows, then ah know mi Blog's okay. :-)

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Shop Lock

Last night a lady called in to Pastess' radio show, an' started discussin' her personal life. De male callers' outrage to her info prompted Da Piggy to write this version ov Elephant's "Bad Man" song:
Bad man don't bathe
Them deh boy noh have noh rag
Bad man a weak heart
Yet him deh a road a brag
Shotta clothes don't WASH
A dutty clothes them boy deh wear ...
This version ov de song is supposed to be de female's response to de scorn that some ov those so-called "gallis" like Ele display toward women. How can men who claim to be ladies' men, show such scorn for de female body?
The lady on Pastess made de mistake ov tellin' people that she 'helped herself' now an' then (
Doc called this "takin' bizniz in hand" or "holdin' a back" in his recent post about a public flasher. Anyway, de worst part ov it for de woman was when she said that she's 64 years old. Oh no! One popular caller, David, said that she's too old to be settin' that kinda example, an' he'd NEVER let that woman cook for him, "She's a dirty woman, I'd never eat from har!" Others hopped on his band-wagon; a few women even got in on de act. Pastess had shows about what should be de right age for people to throw in de sexual towel. On those shows, many people said there's no age limit for men, but that women should retire from sex before they reach 60. Pastess says that this just shows how narrow people's views are, an' that de best example de older woman coulda set for kids was to call in an' discuss frankly some details ov her personal life as she had done.
Pastess has a point. Ah saw a psych on TV once who had de same view. She said she grew up knowin' very little about adult issues an' was totally unprepared for ALL ov it. She was candid wif de young girls to whom she directed her speech, tellin' them that their Moms shoulda already told them all that they were hearin' that day. She said she knew that their Moms prob'ly had de same experiences, that she wasn't de only one who learnt de hard way that sex an' love are very separate for a vast number ov men, that a man's body an' a woman's body were wired so alike an' yet so differently, an' that she wasn't de only rocket scientist who thought that she was really dyin' when she first had an orgasm. She said too many women are ignorant ov how their parts work. Well, if de responses on Pastess are much to go by, she can add a lot ov J'can girls to her list ov de sexually ignorant, 'cause those callers were sure puttin' on a pious act last night!